The Bitches, Part 13

Catch up with the first 12 parts here!


Cherish lifts her head out of her hands. She stares at her palms, still tinged pink. “There are things,” she whispers, “that I’ve had the courage to do.”

The Bitches scoff, their favourite verbal expression when it comes to her. “You? Courage? Those two words don’t belong in the same sentence.”

Cherish glares at them. The Bitches are so ugly; The Bitches are so beautiful. “There are things,” she says, a little louder than the first time, “that I have had the courage to do.”

“Okay…heard you the first time. Still don’t believe you; still not buying it.”

Cherish is now speaking at her regular volume. “There are things,” and she balls her hands into fists, training her eyes at The Bitches, who stand before her, their expressions partially smug, partially amused, “that I’ve had the courage to do.”

“The fuck,” Bitch One puzzles, “are you stuck in an infinite loop?”

Like a dog, Cherish bares her teeth, and starts to walk towards The Bitches, who actually back up – albeit mockingly – their eyes wide and their hands held up in a parody of surrender.

“Oooh,” Bitch Two giggles. “Someone’s grown a pair.”

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The Bitches, Part 12.

Refresh your memory here!


The Bitches aren’t fazed at all.

“So? Go ahead, get it over with already!” Bitch One urges.

“Seriously,” agrees Bitch Two. “You’re better off dead, and you know it!”

“You think you offing yourself is a threat to us? We encourage it! Go the fuck ahead!”

“You look like a stupid, ugly wet rat standing there!”

“Hell, if you don’t do it soon, maybe we can help!”

Cherish is still standing in the shower, the water on full blast, the razor still poised above her wrist. The hand that’s holding the razor is trembling now as she considers her next move. All the courage she’d had, that made her challenge The Bitches mere moments ago, has seemed to go down the drain with the water.

“What are you waitin’ for? What do you have left? You’ve lost your man, who, by the way, is marrying someone else…”

“You’ve lost your job…”

“You’re broke…”



“And, oh yeah! The cops are after your ass!”

“So whaddya have left to live for?”

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The Bitches, Part 11

Refresh your memory here!


The Woman Who Looks Like Cherish’s Sisters never came back after Cherish had found her on the couch with The Man She Used To Know. Cherish told herself that she didn’t care, but she was curious as to where she went. Finally moved into her condo? (Cherish suspected that the condo had been ready the whole time and The Woman Who Looks Like Cherish’s Sisters just pretended it hadn’t – to her own advantage). Found another home to wreck? Cherish sincerely hoped it was the latter, because that would mean she would leave The Man She Used To Know alone.

Either way, it didn’t matter.

“Look,” The Man She Used To Know said the same night he’d been caught fucking The Woman Who Looks Like Cherish’s Sisters. Cherish was still smarting from his rejection – and partially ashamed of herself for throwing herself at him. It was like hanging onto the edge of a cliff by your fingernails, clawing desperately but futilely at rocks and dirt, knowing that no matter how much you crawled and fought, you were still going to fall off the edge.

“Look. It’s clear we’ve run our course. We can talk and talk and talk and talk, but at the end of the day…” He threw up his hands. “It’s over.”

Cherish was sitting on the bed, her arms still wrapped around her folded legs, her head resting on her arms. The Man She Used To Know sat about a foot away from her. She opened her mouth, but he raised a hand before she could start speaking. “I know what you’re about to say. And you’re right: cheating on you was completely wrong. I’m totally going to put that out there. And I’m sorry you had to see what you saw today.”

“Please. I think you wanted to get caught. And having her live here? Taking all these liberties? Pretty fucked up.”

The Man She Used To Know sighed and stood up. “I’ve already apologized for and acknowledged that, okay? I don’t want to fight with you anymore; nor do I want to draw this out anymore. So,” and he turned to face her, clasping his hands together. “I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to move out.” He flinched slightly as he awaited her reaction.

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Johnny Cage and The Assless Chaps, featuring Colette

Last year  I started the segment “It’s A Jolly Holiday“, wherein I intended to write a short story for every holiday. At first I fulfilled that promise – albeit, not always on the exact date of the holiday – but then fell off in a big way. But judging from my track record, is this really a surprise?

(More on that later.)

Regardless, I’m gonna try again. Hope I can stick to it this time! To kick things off – slightly late, of course – is my story for New Year’s. It’s a little unusual though, ’cause the story has nothing to do with New Year’s, except for the fact that it was written on New Year’s Day by three really bored people who were too lazy to venture outside.

Yes, that’s right: it was a collaborative effort: the “you write one line, then I write the next line, etc.”  Try to guess which ones I wrote.

Disclaimer: if you can’t tell by the title of this post, this story went downhill fast, mostly thanks to the mention of assess chaps, natch. Simply put: this story is a hot mess, and I should be too embarrassed to post this, but whatevs; I’m still bored.

Sad that this is considered as excitement in my life.

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55 Word Short Stories: It’s All In The Delivery

Note: This also counts as a holiday story.

Wendy kept James awake with her tossing and turning, but he understood, considering her advanced condition.

Just as he finally got to sleep, he woke up to the sound of Wendy exiting the bathroom, saying “Happy Labour Day!”

Still half-asleep, he mumbled, “But that was yest – oh,” stopping short when he saw her drenched nightgown.

55 Word Short Stories: Pregnant Pause 2.

It’s been five years since Kim and Caitlin have seen each other, so they make a date over Facebook to meet for a sushi lunch.

“Oh my God!” Kim exclaims at Caitlin’s protruding figure. “You’re expecting!”

“Oh my God!” Caitlin replies, looking Kim up and down. “So are you!”

Kim frowns. “No, I’m not.”

55 Word Short Stories: Eating Out.

At the dinner table, Sienna wrinkles her nose in disgust at Adele’s plateful of pasta. “How can you put all those carbs in your mouth?” she scoffs as she digs into her salad.

“Uh, considering all the things you put in your mouth, I wouldn’t talk!” her twin shoots back.

“Girls!” their mother scolds.